Reprinted with permission.
By Elia Lawatsch
I recently learned that my dear friend, Val Lovelace, is retiring as the Executive Director of Maine Death with Dignity, and I’ve been sitting with the news ever since. It landed in my chest in that familiar way that only truly meaningful transitions do: heavy, tender, and full of gratitude.
Val’s retirement is deeply bittersweet. I am happy for her. She will have more time to spend with her beautiful family and take space to continue adjusting to the health issues that have progressed and shaped her life in such profound ways. And yet, I can’t ignore the magnitude of what her presence has meant to me, to this movement, and to so many people whose lives were changed because she simply refused to give up.
Working alongside an End-of-Life Advocacy Hero
I’ve known Val for about a decade. During that time, I’ve worked with her as a colleague at Death with Dignity, engaged with her work as she led Maine Death with Dignity as Executive Director, and somewhere along the way, I gained something far more personal and enduring—I gained a lifelong friend.
Val is truly one of my few advocacy heroes. That’s not a phrase I use lightly. It’s earned through consistency, courage, humility, and love for people at their most vulnerable. Her tenacity has not only fueled the movement in Maine, but also the work I’ve been fortunate enough to do at Death with Dignity for close to a decade.
A colleague of ours in New Mexico, Barak Wolff, recently put it so perfectly as he was reflecting on Val’s contribution: “Val is the heart of our movement; she speaks with thoughtful integrity, and she is an ethical and fierce warrior in the fight for our cause.”
I remember the first time I truly understood how much I would learn from Val. In 2018, I had the privilege of traveling to Maine to support her and the extraordinary volunteer network she built across the state during their signature-gathering initiative to bring a Death with Dignity law to the Pine Tree State.
That trip gave me my first real glimpse of the powerhouse she is. Val led with calm determination, strategic brilliance, and deep compassion. She knew every volunteer by name, every county by heart, and every reason why this work mattered. Watching her in action was witnessing advocacy at its best: grounded, human, and relentless in the face of obstacles.
The 25-Year Fight to Pass Maine’s Death with Dignity Act
Passing an aid-in-dying law in Maine was never going to be easy. Every state that has succeeded has done so after at least a decade of sustained effort. In Maine, it took 25 years.
Val stepped into this fight in 2013 with a handful of volunteers and a willingness to learn policy and politics on the fly. In 2014, she founded the organization It’s My Death, now known as Maine Death with Dignity. By 2015, she was already deep into the legislative process with Senator Roger Katz’s bill, LD 1270. She celebrated the victory of passing the bill through the House and felt the gut punch of losing in the Senate—a crash course in how unforgiving and exhausting policy-making can be.
What stands out to me is that Val never walked away. She understood something fundamental about medical aid in dying advocacy: persistence is everything. Policymakers sometimes count on people giving up. Val never did, even when the work was heartbreaking, especially when it meant watching people die in the exact ways they had hoped to avoid while the legislative process dragged on.
The Turning Point: Volunteers, Ballots, and Victory
In 2017, the fight continued. That year, Maine’s bill passed the Senate but not the House, all under a governor who had promised to veto the bill.
Instead of backing down, Val helped lead one of the most strategic and courageous efforts I’ve ever witnessed. In 2018, she coordinated a dual approach—running the bill through the legislature while also launching a ballot initiative. On election day, 160 volunteers were out in the field gathering signatures. Our team at Death with Dignity was also there on the ground, handing out refreshments, rooting on the work, and offering support however needed.
That effort created the leverage needed, and ultimately, the bill passed through the legislature. When Governor Janet Mills signed Maine’s Death with Dignity Act into law, Val wept alongside everyone who had been waiting and hoping for that moment for decades.
But for Val, that wasn’t the finish line. It was the beginning.
When the law went into effect, she received an email from a patient that simply said, “I’m ready, and my physicians support me. Now what do we do?” That moment crystallized what aid-in-dying laws truly mean to people with terminal illness. It made it clear that implementation, education, and support are just as critical as passage.
What makes Val so effective in those moments is her ability to sit with challenges and lead with the heart. Molly McMahon Graziano, another advocate working to bring assisted dying to Ohio, articulated this beautifully when she said, “What strikes me most about Val is her ability to hold space for complexity. She’s witnessed firsthand the suffering that comes when people lack options, and she’s also sat with countless individuals as they’ve made their end-of-life choices. That lived experience informs everything she does.”
Since 2019, Val has poured herself into building a volunteer community, supporting patients and families, and forming partnerships with Maine providers. That work—quiet, steady, deeply human—is her true legacy.
National Impact Through Dignity50 and Medical Aid-in-Dying Advocacy Tools
Val also played an enormous role nationally. During her time at Death with Dignity, she developed the Dignity50 program, creating a leadership network where state advocacy and implementation leaders could learn, collaborate, and grow together.
She also helped build the Dignity50 Roadmap training, along with our Report and State Statute Navigators, tools that empower advocates with knowledge and make it easier to launch and sustain assisted-dying efforts. These resources are timeless, and their impact will be felt for decades.
Championing Advocacy Rooted in Love
What Val may never fully grasp is how profoundly she has shaped the people around her, including me. This work changed her, as she’s often said, helping her listen more deeply and focus on what truly matters. I saw that transformation up close.
Val taught me that advocacy rooted in compassion is not a weakness. It’s the strongest force we have. She showed me what it means to care for one another fully, to hold both sorrow and joy while navigating difficult conversations, and to keep going even when the road is impossibly long.
“Val is one of my favorite people on the planet. She leads with love, is a walking testament to moral courage, and she gets shit done. Her art makes the world a better and more beautiful place. I am blessed to have worked alongside her for the last ten years to change how people die, and now, it is an honor to simply call her ‘friend.’”
– Peg Sandeen, CEO Death with Dignity
A Personal Thank You
Val, you have touched countless lives. You have changed the landscape of aid in dying in Maine and strengthened the movement nationwide. I am endlessly grateful to have learned from you, worked beside you, and call you my friend.
As you step into this next chapter, I know your impact will continue to ripple outward, carried by the people and communities you helped build.
Thank you, Val. For not giving up. For meeting this work with humanity. For being exactly who you are.
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